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sick of bigots

Posted: Fri Sep 22, 2023 9:53 pm
by 26beanbags
this is kinda be a rant but if you have any advice thatd be really nice <3
(potential warning for antisemitism and homophobia)
i am sick of being jewish, and everything that comes with it. i am so lucky too, and ive still experienced antisemitism. i am so grateful to never have beenput in explicit danger because of my religion, but i am scared. i dont want to go to temple because i am paranoid that someone will harm me. people still make h0l0c4ust and h1tler jokes, even some of my friends. and i have to laugh.i dont want to have to explain that saying antismetic stuff, is antisemetic. and i feel ungrateful too. i feel like my fear isnt real, since other jews and temples have actually been damaged and or k1//ed. i dont want to be "the jewish friend" or the "lgbt friend", i want to be a person. i dont want to hear jokes upon jokes when we're learning about Anne Frank. i dont want to be treated like a second class citizen because im part of the lgbt community. its frustrating. and the thing is, im EXTRA privileged. im white, and my father has money. but i am still an "angry sjw" if i try and say that, 'hey, please dont make notsee jokes' or 'hey, why are you treating me like a dead possum just because im a girl?'. life is weird, and i dont even think im old enough to qualify as paranoid :| so yeah, let me know if i am genuinely being a POS, thx :)

Re: sick of bigots

Posted: Sat Sep 23, 2023 3:28 am
by Latha
Hi 26beanbags

You know, I think it is understandable that you are scared and frustrated. You shouldn't have to listen to jokes about the Holocaust, Hitler, or Anne Frank. You shouldn't have any reason to believe you might be hurt while you're at temple for being Jewish. You shouldn't be treated poorly for being a part of the LGBTQ community. Unfortunately, you've had to deal with those things. The privileges you mentioned can only protect you so much.
i feel ungrateful too. i feel like my fear isnt real, since other jews and temples have actually been damaged and or k1//ed.
You aren't ungrateful for feeling fear. I think your fear is caused by the fact that such things have happened to other Jewish people.

I don't want to uncritically recommend asking the adults in your life for help with the jokes that your peers are making, since that doesn't always work. Do you think your teachers would support you and make it clear that antisemitic comments are not acceptable? That way, you would not have to confront these people on your own.

(Just to clarify, what does dead possum mean here? "hey, why are you treating me like a dead possum just because im a girl?'')

Re: sick of bigots

Posted: Sat Sep 23, 2023 5:21 pm
by 26beanbags
thanks for the reply latha! i dont really have many adults to go to that i could really express my frustration to. what i meant by the dead possum thing, is that people have kinda treated me like roadkill (as in people think im worthless and gross)

Re: sick of bigots

Posted: Sun Sep 24, 2023 2:49 am
by Latha
what i meant by the dead possum thing, is that people have kinda treated me like roadkill (as in people think im worthless and gross)
Oh, that's awful.

I'd getting the sense that it feels like you have no, or very few allies here... I also don't want to suggest that you push back against these things that your peers are saying on your own. Firstly, it doesn't seem like it has worked well in the past, if people are calling you an angry SJW. Secondly, even when that approach does work, it can be pretty exhausting, and isn't something you should feel the responsibility to take on.

You deserve a safe community. Do you think you could join any local LGBT or Jewish youth groups (perhaps even a Jewish LGBT youth group)? Among them, you wouldn't be the LGBT friend or the Jewish friend.
people still make h0l0c4ust and h1tler jokes, even some of my friends. and i have to laugh
I wonder, how is your relationship with the friends who don't make such jokes?