a bit embarrassing

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sky
not a newbie
Posts: 586
Joined: Thu Nov 07, 2019 9:15 am
Age: 26
Pronouns: They/them
Sexual identity: Queer
Location: n/a

a bit embarrassing

Unread post by sky »

Hi uhhh, this is kinda embarrassing but I’m not sure who else to ask or talk to about this stuff because I know that here I’ll get honest and good information.

We’ve talked a million times but now I have discovered I am a trans man :) Anyways, I’m just wondering some things. Okay, if I want to have sex without insertion (pls don’t use the p word it triggers me) because I hate my genitalia but I don’t want someone to see my bottom half naked. What do I do?

I know there is straps but it’s like, give me head on a plastic material? Sounds kinda odd (no offense)? Do people do that? I don’t know what I’m trying to say. I know that there’s Manuel and doing mutual masturbation and like dry humping but no one wants to those things because it’s “things horny teens do when they are saving themselves for marriage” yes that ones been told to me :/. I want the person satisfied but I want myself to be too.

Is there even things to do?

Disclaimer: this is not a manic thingy like it was before, I’m genuinely curious and ever since I have started to understand my body and my feelings more I feel much more comfortable with sex because you all taught me boundaries are okay and it’s not bad to have them and you would be so proud of me, I have literally stopped talking and unmatched on tinder because they didn’t stop when I said stop or called me things I didn’t like. It feels nice, to not treat myself like shit. Also this stuff isn’t happening now considering we’re in a pandemic.

<3
Jacob
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 1056
Joined: Tue Jul 29, 2014 3:33 am
Age: 35
Primary language: English
Pronouns: They
Location: Leeds UK

Re: a bit embarrassing

Unread post by Jacob »

Hi Sky!

I think it's worth exploring things even if they do 'sound' odd or unfamiliar... lots of us have the kinds of sex that might be considered 'odd' but that doesn't mean they are odd. People's actual sex activities are way more varied than we are led to think... and some things that are treated as unusual in media or casual conversation, are often very common in real life.

Usually how good we might feel to eventually be intimate with people we care about in ways we enjoy is totally worth turning away people who would rather do things we aren't into.

So if dry humping and mutual masturbation sound like things you'd most prefer to do, go for it. There's nothing particularly unusual about a sex life that centers those things!
"In between two tall mountains there's a place they call lonesome.
Don't see why they call it lonesome.
I'm never lonesome when I go there." Connie Converse - Talkin' Like You
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