Hi all! Hope everyone is doing okay during these wild and crazy times. ❤ Long story short: I've noticed that when I put two fingers inside of me, that feels totally fine. But anything more than that (like a vibrator) and the penetration feels too wide and hurts, even with lube. Is there anything I c...

Aww, thanks Amanda! I appreciate it ♥

I'm glad to hear you're doing positive things for yourself like staying connected to friends and support systems and keeping up with fun things! Plus I am so excited about your new cat of course. :) Things are so weird right now, for so many people, and in the US especially stuff is SO up in the ai...

Hi Siân! So sorry I totally forgot to respond, and thanks for replying!! Things have been crazy on my end and I had to deal with an emergency (unrelated to covid). Let me respond to this in chunks. You 100% get to have normal human feelings! I'm glad you're giving yourself some grace, and it sounds ...

Hi folks! Hope everyone is doing well and staying safe during these tough times. <3 Seeing as this quarantine is gonna be going on indefinitely, I wanted to ask other single people who want to find a partner: how have you been healthily coping and reframing things for yourselves while in quarantine?...

Thanks so much, Alexa and Mo! I really appreciate it. He’s truly such a blessing, I love him to bits. <3

Hi all, Hope everyone is doing well and staying safe! <3 I just recently adopted a cat, and he is literally one of the best things that's ever happened to me. He's taught me a lot about trauma and how I view myself through that lens. Before we met, he was likely someone's former pet, who was either ...

Hi MusicNerd, Just chiming in to say that mentioning self-esteem in general and then gradually integrating the dating portion into it sounds like a really good approach! That way, you get the skills and information you're looking for in a form where you can apply them to lots of different parts of ...

Ooh, okay - that's an external and equally valid reason to think that she'd judge you. That must have been frustrating for you. Therapy should be a non-judgmental place. I'm glad she apologized for that; therapists are human too, after all. Self-esteem would be a great thing to bring up with her if...

But I guess it’s a bit more difficult to want that when neither of us are men and aren’t socialized to be “the pursuers” in a heteronormative world. I'm glad you brought this up! A lot of queer folx who have been raised as femme might struggle with dating because yes - they weren't socialized to be...

I totally see that it can feel overwhelming, especially with all those extra worries crowding in your head. It can be hard to understand that whether a particular person wants to date you is not a judgement on your value, whether you are "good enough". For example, I can think someone is ...

Great! Does knowing that if you like someone you could text them to ask for a date help with some of the worries you have? Yeah, I think it does somewhat? There’s no way I could do it in-person, so texting seems easier. Putting yourself out there can be hard, and feeling some amount of certainty ab...

Hey Karyn, Yeah no, I totally agree that serious convos are probably not great over text. But I definitely connected with what you were saying here: For some folks, it might even be preferred: some people like having some time to think about their response and not feel so put on the spot like a face...

Hi Amanda, You know, I didn’t think about it as taking away someone else’s autonomy and not allowing them to make a decision for themself... but I guess I kinda am doing that when I avoid expressing interest and assume they won’t like me. That’s a fair point! There are definitely ways to put somethi...

Hey Amanda, I’m hanging in there, thanks for asking. And no, it’s not pandemic-related stuff thankfully. Thank you for attaching those articles! I can totally relate to what the letter-writer said in Captain Awkward’s post: “Friends” is easy and comfortable, and “more” is — or feels — complicated an...

Hi Amanda! OMG, so sorry for the delay!! Lots of not-great things have been happening on my end recently, so I got distracted by having to handle all that. But yeah, I really like the idea of doing a picnic, since it would automatically be a sober event and a nice way to meet people in a low-pressur...

(Oh, also forgot to mention for clarification: the person I met through a dating app was someone I was seeing in-person as well. Like we connected on the app, but then we had all of our dates in real life. So she ghosted even then. But yeah, that’s not as important of a detail as everything I respon...

Hey MusicNerd, I'm sorry you had that experience on a dating app. That's not fun. It's unfortunate that people use the internet to protect themselves from important conversations with other folks. Hi Alexa! Thanks for responding. Yeah totally, it definitely was not fun. :( Just trying to remember t...

Hi all! Hope everyone is doing okay :) This quarantine has got me doing a lot more introspective work lately (more than I already was doing before this pandemic!) and a lot of questions have been coming up for me. So, long story short: before lockdown, I had met someone through a dating app and we w...

DArwin wrote:Awesome job It's hard to make a long term commitment

Thanks, DArwin! It definitely is a commitment every day.

Sam W wrote:Just chiming in with even more congrats!

Thanks, Sam!! Omg thanks everyone for being so awesome and supportive! <3

I saw this on my day off and it was VERY hard not to respond! I'm in happytears for you, MusicNerd. So proud, and so glad that you feel so supported and as strong as you are. You've always so clearly been such an amazing person, and I'm so glad that you have been able to find a way to amp up your a...

Mo wrote:That's really fantastic!

Thanks, Mo!!

Alice M. wrote:Congratulations on this astounding milestone! I am so glad that you feel supported here.

Thanks, Alice!! Means a lot

Hi!! You might remember from this thread a while back ( Parental Abuse and AA ) but I’m in AA and have been trying to get sober. As of last weekend, I finally have 1 year sober!!! :D I didn't know if I could do it, because some days were so so hard. But I’m so grateful for the support I got in that ...